03-19-04 @ 9:26 am EST

I want to come back and post in here and just be happy and forget about things again, but...it's been so quiet that I can't think of anything else. Aside from P., who reviews and writes to me by snail mail, it's like everyone else I liked to consider friends has disappeared. I realize everyone is much busier than I am, and all have lives, and nobody can ever be on call for me...but it's been so long now, and nobody seems to be around anymore.

I hate to sound so ungrateful but I just can't stop agonizing about it. What happened to the people who I really thought cared? Are there any of them left? Was I wrong all this time?